Two Kinds of Froward

A few years ago I met someone whom I would describe as the kindest and most defiant person I had ever come across. He was not an angry man; he was not constantly seeking a fight. Yet, as polite as he was, he absolutely refused to accept anything that was different than the way he believed or behaved. Now, I am sure you know there is a difference between a person who is persevering in their beliefs, and someone who is just plain stubborn. He was the latter; but he did it with a genuine kindness.

This man, as sad as it is, was completely froward. I have mentioned this sin before in posts and in homilies. To be froward is to refuse to accept correction; ever. A froward person may seek advice, but if the advice is not what he was hoping for, he will reject it (because he believes that, ultimately, he knows more than the person from whom he is receiving advice).

We usually think of a froward person as belligerent and always disagreeable, yet this is not accurate. There are actually two kinds of froward people: we can call them, "rebellious froward" and "pompous froward". Why do I say "pompous"? Because those who are froward and yet polite about it, are doing so because they have been blinded by their pride and are looking down on everyone else with an attitude of superiority. They see all other opinions as pitiful and not worthy of consideration. This kind of froward behavior is clearly the more dangerous of the two. The rebellious froward person can likely see his rebellion and will more easily repent of it. The pompous froward person is harder to show his error.

We all know the rebellious froward when we see them. These are the typical rebellious teenagers, society's troublemakers who are always breaking the law, and various types of anarchists. The pompous frowards, though, are harder to recognize, but it is important for us to know what to look for. This is not so that we can point them out to condemn them, but so that we can watch for it in ourselves and our families. The pompous frowards are those who, like the Pharisees of the first century, are wise in their own eyes, and are generally arrogant, but hide it very well.

Do not go out with a judgmental eye looking to find and label others (if you do, that proves you are being a bit froward!). Instead, spend some time in prayer and examine your own heart and mind. Leave "no stone unturned" before the Lord. As the authors of the Psalms often do, present yourself before God and ask Him to show you where you need to repent; because He loves you, He will do so.